The One-Cold-Slot Toaster

One slot works beautifully, and the other has simply decided, spiritually, that it does not participate — so you and everyone you love have memorized which side is the good side. You pop fast, you pop unpredictably, and half your toast comes out pale and untouched by heat, and yet nobody replaces you because deep down you are irreplaceably, endearingly broken. A humble icon of 'good enough'.